Death Wish
by Omnicat
Summary: "Do you have a death wish?" he had asked her. Over time, she learned to answer with "Yes." And now, she has learned to make him stop asking. He'll never ask again. / 2xH, NOT a death fic


**Title:** Death Wish

**Author:** Omnicat v''v

**Rating:** T

**Genre:** Angst, Romance

**Spoilers & desirable foreknowledge:** Duo's Episode Zero and the entire TV-series.

**Warnings:** Nudity and sexual activities. Nothing explicit or even detailed beyond 'they're making love', though. Angst.

**Pairings:** Duo Maxwell x Hilde Schbeiker.

**Soundtrack:** None that_ I _know of. Do you have any suggestions?

**Disclaimer:** No, I am not one of the lucky few who hold the copyrights to everything Gundam Wing, up until the word 'gundam' itself. Because of that, I'm not making any money with this - I'm just having a little fun!

**Summary:** DM x HS "Do you have a death wish?" he had asked her. Over time, she learned to answer with "Yes." And now, she has learned to make him stop asking. He'll never ask again.

**Author's Note:** This _so_ didn't turn out the way I had in mind. There's nothing wrong with this, I like it lots, but the original idea was a darkish, kinky Duo x Hilde lemon. Yeah. Well, I hope you'll enjoy this nonetheless. It probably turned out for the best, as I'm actually not really able to write lemon scenes yet.

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**Death Wish**

"Do you have a death wish or something?" the first time he asked her that, it had been in anger.

She'd been lying in bed. A hospital bed on board the Peacemillion spacecraft. The question wasn't one that had surprised her, after all she'd done. His rage hadn't surprised her either, though the intensity was more than she'd anticipated. His eyes had burned with it like she'd never seen before. His posture had tautened with it, and taken an instinctual looming position over her. It had frightened her, seeing him like that. The fact that it was because of her had twisted her gut in more than one way. But she hadn't budged. Her eyes had been wide with fear, but her face set with defiance.

When she hadn't answered, he'd repeated it in anguish. "Do you have a death wish?"

He had lowered his head to hide the tears suddenly threatening to spill and let his shoulders slump, his hands limply uncurling from the way they had been balled to white-knuckled fists before. He had dropped to his knees right next to the bed. "Oh Duo, of course not!" She had answered then, but though negative in response to his question, what she told him of her desire to help and stand by him hadn't been to his satisfaction, it seemed. It had been the first time she'd seen him cry, and the first time he refused to tell her why. But it had certainly not been the last.

"Do you have a death wish, Hilde?" The next time he'd asked her, it had been in a metallic voice, from a mouth set in a face devoid of any emotion.

This time, it had been him that lay in bed. His bedroom in her home, where both of them had lived together for many months already, safe and healthy. She'd answered, startled, with a confused: "No. I have a different wish." The way she was dressed - or rather, undressed - should have made that clear, shouldn't it? He'd thrown her out. Just like that. No explanation, no apology. She had been utterly dumbfounded. Afraid to speak to him or even look him in the eye for days. Probably for the best. His cheer hadn't skipped a beat towards her from the morning after onwards, which had confused her even more. But it still hadn't been the least of the confusion he would cause her.

Because then he asked her for the fourth time. "Do you have a death wish?" Deep, sultry and so very seductive.

She lay in her own bed this time, and he loomed over her again. Shivers ran down her spine at his words. As she looked up at the way the lamppost outside her window illuminated some parts of his features and bare chest, and cast others in shadow, she finally understood what he meant. "Yes." she breathed, entranced by the beautiful, darkened deity. It was one of the last untroubled breaths she took that night, before his lips crashed down on hers and their bodies melted together. He was conscious enough to put on a condom beforehand, and when he asked her if she was satisfied afterwards, she repeated "Yes." without a second thought.

He kept asking her from that moment onwards: "Do you have a death wish?"

She kept answering positively. She understood now, after all. But the outcome changed, and she became confused again. He made love to her every time, tenderly and lovingly, and she made love to him in the same way, hoping that this time, he wouldn't cry. But every time he came she felt tears stream down his face. When she told him that somebody's bare shoulder wasn't the best place to hide your tears, he laughed, kissed her, and cheered up almost immediately. He never answered when she asked him what it was that was bothering him, though. He just cried and held her and claimed that everything would be alright.

He asks her the familiar question, more apprehensive, always more apprehensive than the last time. "Do you have a death wish?"

She says "Yes.", and they make love, and Duo's tears form the only stains on the sheets. She finally understands. Hilde brushes away the tears and he looks up at her, his lashes wet, his cheeks glistening and his eyes surprised. She takes off the condom and pulls him close again. "No more of this, Duo. Don't ask me ever again. You are alive, I am alive. That's not going to change. We'll live our lives and let other lives live. No more Death." He stares at her, and in his eyes, she sees that he finally accepts. "No more death." he repeats softly.

He'll never ask again.

She'll cut his braid in a few long months time. A baby of Duo Maxwell and Hilde Schbeiker does not mix well with swishy objects within its reach, after all.

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**PSAN:** Yep, I definitely like it. Do you? Please Read and Review! Hm, I may still write the lemon scene I first intended, someday. Hope, threaten, bribe or give suggestions if you want, but don't stay up for it. Lack of sleep can be fatal, after a certain amount of infinity.

And no, I will not be scared off by death-threats for cutting Duo's braid. For symbolism's sake...


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